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An American holiday

Posted: Tuesday, November 20, 2007 8:11 AM

By Don Teague, NBC News Correspondent

 
DALLAS – I had an interesting conversation with a close friend of mine the other day. She’s an Iraqi who’s been living (legally) in the United States for the past three years. We were on the phone, talking about Thanksgiving.

"My lawyer is so nice," Rafraf said. "She invited me to Thanksgiving with her family, but I told her I’m going home."

By "home" she meant my house. 

Rafraf’s parents, and ten brothers and sisters still live in Iraq. She’s one of thousands of Iraqis who have risked their lives to work with Americans – in her case working as a translator for NBC News in our Baghdad Bureau.

Here in the U.S., my wife and I are Rafraf’s family. We helped bring her here to attend college in Florida. My daughters think of her as a big sister. We always encourage her to come home for Thanksgiving.

"It’s funny," she told me, "because I don’t think my lawyer is a Christian. Isn’t Thanksgiving a Christian holiday?"

"It’s an American holiday," I answered. "And it’s one of the few ‘true’ holidays we have left."

By "American" I don’t mean citizens versus non-citizens, immigrants versus non-immigrants, blacks versus whites, vegetarians versus meat-eaters, doves versus hawks, Republicans versus Democrats, Native-Americans versus Non-Native Americans, or rich versus poor. 

I’m not talking about any of the myriad things that divide us as a nation. I’m talking about all of us – the 300 million of us that make up the American Family.

For 364 days each year we may focus on other priorities in our lives. But on the fourth Thursday each November, we’re asked to reflect on the things that we’re grateful for. We don’t have to drink green beer, send gifts, carve pumpkins, or shoot off fireworks. We are asked, simply, to be thankful.

Not always easy
For many, I realize, it’s a difficult time.

There was a traffic accident near my house last week. I knew it was bad when I saw two medical helicopters land in the field behind my back yard. A fifteen-year-old girl died in the accident, two others are fighting for their lives. All are from my daughter’s high school. How can their families be thankful?

My wife’s cousin lost a child this year. A close friend of ours lost her husband. Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan have taken a terrible toll on American service members and their families. Some are broken, poor, homeless or hungry. 

Along with many other Iraqis, Rafraf’s family lives in fear of bombing, kidnapping and murder.

How can any of them be thankful? To be honest, I don’t know. But I know many of them will give thanks on Thursday, nonetheless. 

I, personally, will thank God for things big and small: For the health of my family (a big thing in my book); for the freedoms I enjoy as an American; and for the men and women who fight to protect those freedoms.

Our Thanksgiving gathering will include Christians, agnostics, a Muslim, a part-time Buddhist, a struggling single mom, a war veteran, a refugee, liberals and conservatives. We’ll eat some turkey, watch some football and give thanks.

An American family, celebrating an American holiday.

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Comments

only the idiots put their full name and city of residence along with their comments so the rest of us can look up their phone number on the internet and call to tell them how stupid they are.

john doe, seattle, washington (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 8:33 PM)

I don't understand why some have to come in and put down something that comes over occasionally uplifting and thinks they have to hand the world a reality check. If it were your job, you'd be working as a government aide.  Shut the yak hole and open the long forgotten biological ornaments hanging from the sides of your head. Listen. Thanksgiving has a principle. This article talks about that principle. When people bring up morbid histories about one thing or the other, you totally missed the point. If you don't want to pay attention to the point, then spread your hate elsewhere.  Some of us just want to give thanks for what we have. The rest of you are undeserving of your ability to state your opinion the way you do.  You aren't even thankful you have that right.  You are a disrespectful ingrate. But I still love you, because you just gave me another thing to be thankful for.

Palmyra Swift, Upstate, NY (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 8:54 PM)

My wife is Kiowa.  This morning she as most mornings she thanks God for her life and family.  She recognizes the problems with the past but does not dwell on it.  You can go all through history and find that all races, tribes, colonies, countries or just people in general, have been mastered, beaten, killed and removed from their properties either by outside forces or from within (yes, even our governement.  Anyone ever hear of eminent domain?).  The point is, you can sit there and fume until you are miserable and full of hate or you can do what most humans have done for eons, either fight back which makes enemies or assimilate into what has evolved into what is yet the freest nation on earth and make something of yourself.

Bob-a-son, Yukon, Oklahoma (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 9:05 PM)

Wow... I guess I will chime in for the shallow food mongers, I am all behind making up more holidays that put 9 pies on a table.  I come from a monster huge family and my Mother would make every kid thier favorite pie, my Dad a cake and even make sure the dogs had something festive to eat.  I look at my own family history and when we are all together, I get to hear MY personal history distorted  by my brothers who claim I tried to end their lives on many occasion.  I recall trying to add a sense of adventure to their boring lives, great exaggerations are thrown about by both sides and I am afraid the truth suffers at the vanity of our selective memories.  I am just glad that we can do all the things we want/think/might make us happy and it is that  (and the pie ....apple for me) that I try to focus on.  Happy November 22nd to all.

Shari Newitt, Anchorage, Alaska (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 9:28 PM)

This is just so second grade! All the following information is really unproven! Just to put things in persepctive.....The Native Americans are no more native then the rest of the immigrants that make up this continent.(Theory Maybe??)  They came across the land bridge from Russia, what are now the Aleutian Islands. They were here first, that is all. I was born here, so I AM an American. As much as anyone else alive today. I won't ask for forgiveness for something I had no hand in, and I won't hang my head in shame for something I wasn't party to. History is the past, we are to learn from it, not be judged by it. You wont do anything. But do all a favor. Learn about Native Americans because you have no clue!

Mike AZ (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 9:42 PM)

"...the written text of the Thanksgiving sermon delivered at Plymouth in 1623 by "Mather the Elder." In it, Mather the Elder gave special thanks to God for the devastating plague of smallpox which wiped out the majority of the Wampanoag Indians who had been their benefactors. He praised God for destroying "chiefly young men and children, the very
seeds of increase, thus clearing the forests to make way for a better growth", i.e., the Pilgrims."
http://www.2020tech.com/thanks/temp.html

Dennis McClain-Furmanski, Dalworthington Gardens, Texas (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 9:47 PM)

"Thanksgiving is a typically American holiday. The lavish meal is a symbol of the fact that abundant consumption is the result and reward of production." - Ayn Rand

Ed Kless, Allen, TX (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 9:48 PM)

For all of those out there engaged in self flagellation and/or self congratulatory political correctness, I offer the following. In 1620, one half of my family was living in a German cottage, and the other half was growing beets in Russia. During the 1770's one half was deserting from the Hessian mercenaries, and the other half was still growing beets. My husband's family showed up in the 1800's as refugees from the potato famine. For those of you prostrated by the guilt of exploitation, "give all you have to the poor". For those of you troubled by thoughts of exploitation, live for the moment. One of my relatives lies at the bottom of a mine, and another relative's body was dropped off to freeze on the back porch following a mine disaster. Thanksgiving is a time to me when my hard working family took a break. It is a time when my grandfather who labored 6 days a week and counted pennies took his grandkids for a walk and told them stories in order to give his wife and daughter a break. It is a time, when as my husband puts it, you can eat without feeling guilty. For those of you who have nothing for which to be thankful, I am truly sorry, and I will remember you in my prayers.

Karen Lisbon OH (Sent Tuesday, November 20, 2007 10:45 PM)

All of you Canadians who are irritated that the author said that Thanksgiving is a truely American holiday need to lighten up!  Yes other cultures around the world have a holiday that resembles thanksgiving and yes Canada has it's own Thanksgiving and guess what in October when you have your thanksgiving holiday it is a truely Canadian holiday on that date.  When we as Americans celebrate Thanksgiving on the fourth Thursday every November than it is a truely American holiday.  No one else is celebrating it at that time.  

I think what Don Teague was saying is that this holiday in America (when America celebrates Thanksgiving) is the one holiday that we can all as Americans come together and enjoy each other and be thankful for what we have in our lives.  It doesn't matter where you started your life, what your religion is, what color you are, or what your politcal beliefs are. It's just a time for us to be thankful for what we have.

No one is trying to take away from the fact that CANADA has it's own holiday's as well!!!! Get over it!

Jim, Orlando, Fl (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 12:01 AM)

Last time I checked, Canada was in North America - so technically their Thanksgiving is also an "American Holiday."  As for the hoopla about the native american plight, it is completely inappropriate to use a time set aside for peace and gratitude for your political gain.  The roots of this holiday are just that, to celebrate peace and gratitude for the bounty of the year's labor.  Go on about how Squanto's friends were not welcome, but imagine if you threw a dinner party and someone decide to bring 90 more people unannounced.  Wouldn't you be a bit put out by that?  I bet you would.  

The Pilgrams never engaged in biological warfare to spread disease among the 'heathen natives', and the writings quoted in these comments are carved to suit the purpose of the poster - not the author.  The only documented cases of intentionally spreading disease comes 200 years after what we recognize as the original Thanksgiving, and took place on reservations.  These were acts of a greedy few that wanted to profit from the demise of the remaining natives.  100 million killed is an estimate that has been made to include those that died from illnesses contracted from europeans unintentionally.  

It is terrible to think of the suffering caused by the contact between europeans and native americans, but you need to get past it and make the most of what we have today, which includes a 4 day weekend to celebrate peace and gratitude for the bounty of the year's labor.

Butch, Chicago, IL (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 12:28 AM)

As a pastor of the Christian faith, I do regret the turmoil surrounding the creation of this nation and indeed many nations of the world. By modern standards, the deeds are reprehensible and I would agree with the ethic that laments what happened to indigenous peoples. Part of my heritage is Lakota Sioux so I am painfully aware on some level, of what has been lost. And yet, I would caution us against applying our modern worldview to that era and expecting the people of that era to live up to our present ethics. They are a product of that era, that epoch. It is tragic and we owe a debt of gratitude and honest remembrance to all peoples caught up in that tumultuous time. But we cannot expect them to live up to our present understanding of right and wrong. Doing so makes the same inaccurate judgement of those colonial "savages" that they made of the indigenous peoples when they landed: "They don't think like us so they are uncivilized and barbarian." In case you hadn't noticed those tend to be the words we use to negate their humanity. We have grown up much since those days, but still engage in much the same barbarous behavior. I wonder what will be said of us 400 years from now?

Scott Smith, Morning Sun, Iowa (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 1:11 AM)

I found Diane Elliott’s post a refreshing balance to the typical – be grateful for all the good stuff we have, let’s eat, and watch football – Thanksgiving message. I found the lack of bitterness also refreshing.

“I do not speak these truths to solicit sympathy or the righting of ancestral wrongs. Histories cannot be changed but truth is tool that will give us an opportunity to learn from the mistakes of the past and use this knowledge to prevent them from happening again.”

A bit optimistic maybe, but when you add this to Don Teague’s message of inclusivness and strength in the face of adversity, it makes something worth reflecting on. Now after all this reflection, isn’t there something better to do than watch football?

Chris Frederiksen, Prescott, Ariz. (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 3:57 AM)

Is it really necessary for everyone to try to give a history lesson here?

Thank you Mr. Teague for the wonderful article.  I hope that most of it's readers realize that you are only trying to share your reasons for giving thanks, and join in celebrating this holiday as it should be.

For the rest of you who feel it's necessary to throw in your two cents and poke holes in the caring sentiment that this article was written for, here's my two cents.

1- We are all aware of the tragedy surrounding the origin of Thanksgiving in America, and it truly was horrible, but please try to see this article for what it is meant to convey, a sentiment of joy and thankfulness for whatever you hold dear.  

2- This article was written for an American publication during the time that America celebrates Thanksgiving, so it probably didn't occur to the author that he should have to do a complete background check into all of the countries of the world and add footnotes acknowledging their individual representations and times of this celebration.  Cut the guy some slack and just enjoy it.

Jeff, Omaha, NE (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 4:02 AM)

Come on, you really think that Native Americans eat poorly because of the Europeans.  We all have choices to make about our own diets.  We all have eaten too much salt, sugar and processed foods.  I do feel for what happened to the Native Americans, the African Americans, the Irish Americans, the Jewish Americans and every other group of people oppressed, but I did not do it and I am glad that I live in American and thankful for everything I have.  It is sad that we can't just spend one day enjoying our lives and family and friends.  I wish all of you a wonderful day and a wonderful life.  Please try to be more optimistic and work to secure a better future rather than dwelling on the past.

Tonia, Cleveland, OH (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 4:51 AM)

Thanksgiving, a time to be thankful for all the many blessing we have in the USA and a time to be thankful to God, yes God the one true God that this Christian country used to be thankful too. We were found by our christian founders a "One Nation under God" not under gods.Thanksgiving is the day that I am always to God for His great forgiveness for all the wrongs that have been done and all the goodness that has begun because of His love for a country founded in our love for Him.I am proud to be an American and thankful for God's grace on our great country.I am thankful God loves us.We can not put my thankfulness under a bushel; but out in love for the world to see.I thank God for America and all the freedom He has bless us with dispite ourselves

Bart Strittmatter, Victorville, Ca. (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 5:25 AM)

Thanks be to God from whom all blessings flow. Be thankful for what you have. Quit complaining and finding fault. Everyone should just remember all good things come from God, and He is not partial to anyone. He loves all and desires that all would love Him. If we love God, we will be like Him. Then all these political things would have no meaning, no bearing in our lives. There would be no wars, no killings, no blaming others. All would be peace and joy and love in the Holy Spirit.

Linda, Lorain, Oh. (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 8:25 AM)

  Marcus in Tyler, Texas; you are everything against the spirit and family tradition of Thanksgiving! Your mentality is main reason I would never return to Texas after living there for 6 years! No one could pay me enough to deal with your mind set!
Hope the microwave cooks the turkey TV dinner OK and the 7-11 does not run out of beer! Hope the pick up starts and the double wide trailer does not have a roof leak in it!

Grant Cooper, Honolulu, Hawaii (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 9:23 AM)

Don,
Thank you for such a thoughtful and well written piece.  You are right. Thanksgiving is an all American holiday.  My heart goes out to those who cannot see your point. There is a richness in your words that could lift their hearts.  But as you can see, many here see your thoughts for what they were meant to be.  Thank you for sharing that part of yourself and reminding us thankfulness does not divide us but unites us.

Wally (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 9:45 AM)

As I look at all of the comments here I am puzzled by the negative ones.  I worry about a country where a good portion of it's citizens have so little affection for it and the liberties it provides.  It's almost as though patriotism has skipped a quarter of our generation.  We are given so many rights that at times we fail to appreciate them as we walk around with a sense of entitlement.  Learn the history of why our ancestors came here.  You'll understand why we have all these rights and are afforded all these freedoms we have grown to think is common.  It's not common; it's American.  We should remember that.  More importantly...we should never forget.

Blake, Hartford Connecticut (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 10:26 AM)

Nice article. I feel Thanksgiving has evolved into something much better than the myth about "Pilgrims and Indians" that we tell our children (why do we do that anyway, it is not true).  It makes me very sad to know what other humans do to others, but instead of dwelling on the negative, we should focus on the positive.  We have it in our power to be better than our ancestors, to not repeat their mistakes of thinking that one group of people is better or more important than another.  Our modern Thanksgiving is about beng with family, in whatever form that might be, and being thankful for our lives and our place on this magnificent planet.  Perhaps if we all did this on Thanksgiving and every other day, we would be much happier.  We should recognize the atrocities of the past and vow not to let them be repeated and give thanks that we have the ability to learn from our mistakes.  Blessing to everyone!

MDTK, Richmond, VA (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 10:38 AM)

Nice Article.

Matt in TX (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 10:50 AM)

Another wonderful American holiday !!  Give thanks for what you have and that you lived another year.  We aren't a perfect society, but then, nobody is. All of you complainers, for once, just appreciate what you have.  Sheesh!! And give thanks for President Bush.  Six years after 9/11 and we are still alive and kicking. The terrorists are on the run in Iraq, thanks to him, and his Administration, and our brave military men and women, our allies, and the brave Iraqi people who are working hard to bring their country forward. Happy Thanksgiving everyone !!  Yahoooo !!

Kathy L. El Paso, TX (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 11:55 AM)

First to the article, I am sure your Thanksgiving will be in the tradition of "A" typical American thanksgiving.  To the Native American perspective, I as a Cherokee Indian  actually Chak Taw, God was truely present at that first gathering.  In Bradfords wiritngs he not only gives thank to God but to the Indians who were there to help them.  When the Captain wnet to return to England, not one Pilgrim chose to go.  They stayed where they knew they could die but they were able to worship God Freely .  Thanksgiving is not about saying thank you for thanks sake, it is about saying Thank you To GOD.  If you are going to quote History Quote it correctly.  Raerae

Rae Brittain, Santa Clarita Ca (Sent Wednesday, November 21, 2007 11:57 AM)



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